We Shall All Be Healed
Sunday, January 06, 2008
2007 Survey
1. What did you do in 2007 that you'd never done before? -- Worked with refugees and immigrants. Wrote a 25+ page paper. Turned 21.
2. Did you keep your new years' resolutions, and will you make more for next year? -- My resolution for 2008 is the same as every year: Learn to perfect the "Carlton dance."
3. Did anyone close to you give birth? -- My former roommate's girlfriend, Krystal, had a baby. I'm happy for both her and Dave.
4. Did anyone close to you die? -- For the second straight year, no. Pray that 2008 is the same.
5. What countries did you visit? -- Our great neighbors to the north!
6. What would you like to have in 2008 that you lacked in 2007? -- Financial stability. God knows I didn't have much of that this year.
7. What date from 2007 will remain etched upon your memory, and why? -- No date really stands out this year. May 23rd, I remember, is the day I was able to move in with Bill for the summer. That was a pretty excellent summer.
8. What was your biggest achievement of the year? -- Somehow pulling $450 of rent for 4 months with a shitty waiting tables job and even saving up a lot of money afterwards. Now being officially ONE SEMESTER away from graduating with my Bachelor's degree. Managing WBNY for one last year.
9. What was your biggest failure? -- Not breaking some habits I've been promising myself the entire year I was going to break.
10. Did you suffer illness or injury? -- A lot of neck pain this year, with more spasms than usual. A few nasty head colds. Nothing worse than that, thankfully.
11. What was the best thing you bought? -- New laptop. Acer Aspire 5100 model.
12. Whose behaviour merited celebration? -- My parents undying patience never ceases to amaze me.
13. Whose behaviour made you appalled and depressed? -- A few people. The solution? I associated with them a lot less.
14. Where did most of your money go? -- Necessities. Food/Car, etc.
15. What did you get really, really, really excited about? Living on Elmwood and Lafayette -- being legal to drink. Right now, I'm really really excited about seeing the Capitals and Bruins play in Boston on January 3rd.
16. What songs will always remind you of 2006? -- Blue Oyster Cult - Godzilla, & Bowerbirds - Hooves
17. Compared to this time last year, are you happier or sadder? -- I don't know, I was pretty depressed this time last year. I'm pretty content with everything in my life right now, so, happier.
ii. thinner or fatter? -- fatter. I get winded a lot easier than I used to -- that needs to change.
iii. richer or poorer? -- POOR. To the point of being destitute.
18. What do you wish you'd done more of? -- Hike/Camp.
19. What do you wish you'd done less of? -- Worry.
20. How will you be spending Christmas? -- In Rhode Island, I took a 10-mile hike.
21. Best musical release of 2007? Walilin' Jennys - Firecracker
22. Did you fall in love in 2007? -- No, I did not.
23. How many one night stands? -- Didn't have any.
24. What were your favourite TV programs? -- Probably Scrubs -- no show makes me laugh as hard and go "aw, shucks" as much as that one.
25. Do you hate anyone now that you didn't hate this time last year? -- Just one old boss of mine.
26. What was the best book you read? -- I didn't read enough this year -- but I did finally get around to Steinbeck's "Tortilla Flats," which was pretty good. Oliver Sachs "Musicophilia" is one I've been meaning to get around to.
27. What was your greatest musical discovery? -- The Pines, Pierce The Veil, Disasterpeace, Protomen.
28. What did you want and get? -- A fun summer. A senior year (so far) without any major roadblocks.
29. What did you want and not get? -- More bux$$$
30. What was your favourite film of this year? -- No Country For Old Men or Atonement. Both deserve the best picture award.
31. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you? -- I went to the Anchor Bar with Anthony, Mike, Bill, and Dominic -- we had wings and I drank Genny Cream Ale on tap. Delicious and cheap! I was also 21.
Technically, at midnight the previous night, me and Bill went to McGarret's for a beer and some conversation about the misery of turning 21.
32. What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying? -- A lot more money. Poker money and a savings account only gets you so far.
33. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2007? -- Black shirts, three-day-old jeans, the same pair of 'tims I always wear. All of this covered by a disgustingly large and shaggy head of hair.
34. What kept you sane? -- A steady work schedule at Journey's End --- good friends, too.
35. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most? -- I was quite fond of Mike Huckabee, the Republican Arkansonian running for President.
36. What political issue stirred you the most? -- A local one -- well, local to my parents. My retired pops is president of a local political group, and they've been fighting for the past 6 months on removing the extremely corrupt town council from power.
37. Who did you miss? -- If I made a sincere effort to contact you or speak to you when you contacted me when you wern't around me for anything other than business-related matters, then ------ at some point, I missed you. I don't lie about that stuff.
38. Who was the best new person you met? -- Well, the best ones would be the only ones I make an effort to speak to and spend time with. Jenn, Shea, Pam -- that's about it. I mostly kept in touch with the friends I've already made.
39. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2007. -- Most people only care about themselves.
40. Quote a song lyric that sums up your year. --
You don't need to be worried,
You don't need to feel sorry,
sorry for me.
We just need what is simple,
We all need to be humble,
We don't need to inherit,
all of the evil.
- Wooden Wand
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1. What did you do in 2007 that you'd never done before? -- Worked with refugees and immigrants. Wrote a 25+ page paper. Turned 21.
2. Did you keep your new years' resolutions, and will you make more for next year? -- My resolution for 2008 is the same as every year: Learn to perfect the "Carlton dance."
3. Did anyone close to you give birth? -- My former roommate's girlfriend, Krystal, had a baby. I'm happy for both her and Dave.
4. Did anyone close to you die? -- For the second straight year, no. Pray that 2008 is the same.
5. What countries did you visit? -- Our great neighbors to the north!
6. What would you like to have in 2008 that you lacked in 2007? -- Financial stability. God knows I didn't have much of that this year.
7. What date from 2007 will remain etched upon your memory, and why? -- No date really stands out this year. May 23rd, I remember, is the day I was able to move in with Bill for the summer. That was a pretty excellent summer.
8. What was your biggest achievement of the year? -- Somehow pulling $450 of rent for 4 months with a shitty waiting tables job and even saving up a lot of money afterwards. Now being officially ONE SEMESTER away from graduating with my Bachelor's degree. Managing WBNY for one last year.
9. What was your biggest failure? -- Not breaking some habits I've been promising myself the entire year I was going to break.
10. Did you suffer illness or injury? -- A lot of neck pain this year, with more spasms than usual. A few nasty head colds. Nothing worse than that, thankfully.
11. What was the best thing you bought? -- New laptop. Acer Aspire 5100 model.
12. Whose behaviour merited celebration? -- My parents undying patience never ceases to amaze me.
13. Whose behaviour made you appalled and depressed? -- A few people. The solution? I associated with them a lot less.
14. Where did most of your money go? -- Necessities. Food/Car, etc.
15. What did you get really, really, really excited about? Living on Elmwood and Lafayette -- being legal to drink. Right now, I'm really really excited about seeing the Capitals and Bruins play in Boston on January 3rd.
16. What songs will always remind you of 2006? -- Blue Oyster Cult - Godzilla, & Bowerbirds - Hooves
17. Compared to this time last year, are you happier or sadder? -- I don't know, I was pretty depressed this time last year. I'm pretty content with everything in my life right now, so, happier.
ii. thinner or fatter? -- fatter. I get winded a lot easier than I used to -- that needs to change.
iii. richer or poorer? -- POOR. To the point of being destitute.
18. What do you wish you'd done more of? -- Hike/Camp.
19. What do you wish you'd done less of? -- Worry.
20. How will you be spending Christmas? -- In Rhode Island, I took a 10-mile hike.
21. Best musical release of 2007? Walilin' Jennys - Firecracker
22. Did you fall in love in 2007? -- No, I did not.
23. How many one night stands? -- Didn't have any.
24. What were your favourite TV programs? -- Probably Scrubs -- no show makes me laugh as hard and go "aw, shucks" as much as that one.
25. Do you hate anyone now that you didn't hate this time last year? -- Just one old boss of mine.
26. What was the best book you read? -- I didn't read enough this year -- but I did finally get around to Steinbeck's "Tortilla Flats," which was pretty good. Oliver Sachs "Musicophilia" is one I've been meaning to get around to.
27. What was your greatest musical discovery? -- The Pines, Pierce The Veil, Disasterpeace, Protomen.
28. What did you want and get? -- A fun summer. A senior year (so far) without any major roadblocks.
29. What did you want and not get? -- More bux$$$
30. What was your favourite film of this year? -- No Country For Old Men or Atonement. Both deserve the best picture award.
31. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you? -- I went to the Anchor Bar with Anthony, Mike, Bill, and Dominic -- we had wings and I drank Genny Cream Ale on tap. Delicious and cheap! I was also 21.
Technically, at midnight the previous night, me and Bill went to McGarret's for a beer and some conversation about the misery of turning 21.
32. What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying? -- A lot more money. Poker money and a savings account only gets you so far.
33. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2007? -- Black shirts, three-day-old jeans, the same pair of 'tims I always wear. All of this covered by a disgustingly large and shaggy head of hair.
34. What kept you sane? -- A steady work schedule at Journey's End --- good friends, too.
35. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most? -- I was quite fond of Mike Huckabee, the Republican Arkansonian running for President.
36. What political issue stirred you the most? -- A local one -- well, local to my parents. My retired pops is president of a local political group, and they've been fighting for the past 6 months on removing the extremely corrupt town council from power.
37. Who did you miss? -- If I made a sincere effort to contact you or speak to you when you contacted me when you wern't around me for anything other than business-related matters, then ------ at some point, I missed you. I don't lie about that stuff.
38. Who was the best new person you met? -- Well, the best ones would be the only ones I make an effort to speak to and spend time with. Jenn, Shea, Pam -- that's about it. I mostly kept in touch with the friends I've already made.
39. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2007. -- Most people only care about themselves.
40. Quote a song lyric that sums up your year. --
You don't need to be worried,
You don't need to feel sorry,
sorry for me.
We just need what is simple,
We all need to be humble,
We don't need to inherit,
all of the evil.
- Wooden Wand
Tuesday, October 23, 2007
Dear Elle,
Maybe one day, perhaps, a real update. About my life. Maybe.
Until then, a poem:
Sea Change
__________
I think the sea changes in our lives
are marked by our biggest failures,
or our most iconoclastic moments;
(these two
are not to be confused)
where your personal lightning
strikes an entire ocean,
years of wandering thunder set aside
for one brief second where
the salt water undulates
over your eyelids, carrying
images of ten thousand
anemones, gently gliding
across the seabed, and you,
with your soul
spread out across the large,
flat rocks.
___________________
Hope you enjoyed it. Keep writing yourself, eh?
yr hmbl & obt svt,
kev
|
Maybe one day, perhaps, a real update. About my life. Maybe.
Until then, a poem:
Sea Change
__________
I think the sea changes in our lives
are marked by our biggest failures,
or our most iconoclastic moments;
(these two
are not to be confused)
where your personal lightning
strikes an entire ocean,
years of wandering thunder set aside
for one brief second where
the salt water undulates
over your eyelids, carrying
images of ten thousand
anemones, gently gliding
across the seabed, and you,
with your soul
spread out across the large,
flat rocks.
___________________
Hope you enjoyed it. Keep writing yourself, eh?
yr hmbl & obt svt,
kev
Saturday, August 11, 2007
I haven't cried in maybe a few years, but I really couldn't hold it in much longer when I found out that my parents decided to put Daisy down after nearly twenty years. The operation she had gotten for her arthritis was unsuccessful, and there wasn't any more options. It was the most humane thing to do.
That said, I'm still really fucking sad about it. I loved that cat. She had been around for what was essentially my entire life up to this point.
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That said, I'm still really fucking sad about it. I loved that cat. She had been around for what was essentially my entire life up to this point.
sigh...
Saturday, August 04, 2007
Dear Elle,
I hope you're having fun trekking around France and the rest of Europe -- I know you're likely to have some stories by the time you return to the states. I'll force you to keep your promise of visiting Buffalo with a knife, if I have to. A knife.
I don't have quite as many on my end to offer you, unfortunately. My class ends in a week or so, where I'll be 24 credits away (12 each semester, half of them covered by the internship I'm doing) from graduating with my bachelors of social work.
Money has sometimes been an issue this summer, but I've been able to get just enough hours at my loathsome serving job (if I stay on through the fall, business will undoubtedly pick up -- which is good.) and win enough money through cards (and the occasional gambling session where I play against the house, rather than other people) to a point where paying rent isn't a huge concern.
The last piece of anything that's tied me to Maryland is gone -- my driver's license, to be exact, and I have a nice, new, shiny NY state ID now.
I'm looking forward to the fall. Ideally, I won't be General Manager of WBNY anymore, though I don't plan to abandon the station entirely. I'd like to retain an active role as a member, just without the immense responsibility the position of GM required. Also, in a perfect world, I'll be able to balance my internship (15 hrs/week) and a job (10-15 hrs/week) to a good point. The two classes I'm taking are both on Wednesdays, and are once a week.
I also plan on finally going through the formal application process for the Peace Corps -- I know my chances are probably under 30% of getting in, but it'd be the biggest step in my life I've ever taken, and one that I (honestly) believe God wants me to take. So we'll see.
yr hmbl & obt svt,
kev
|
I hope you're having fun trekking around France and the rest of Europe -- I know you're likely to have some stories by the time you return to the states. I'll force you to keep your promise of visiting Buffalo with a knife, if I have to. A knife.
I don't have quite as many on my end to offer you, unfortunately. My class ends in a week or so, where I'll be 24 credits away (12 each semester, half of them covered by the internship I'm doing) from graduating with my bachelors of social work.
Money has sometimes been an issue this summer, but I've been able to get just enough hours at my loathsome serving job (if I stay on through the fall, business will undoubtedly pick up -- which is good.) and win enough money through cards (and the occasional gambling session where I play against the house, rather than other people) to a point where paying rent isn't a huge concern.
The last piece of anything that's tied me to Maryland is gone -- my driver's license, to be exact, and I have a nice, new, shiny NY state ID now.
I'm looking forward to the fall. Ideally, I won't be General Manager of WBNY anymore, though I don't plan to abandon the station entirely. I'd like to retain an active role as a member, just without the immense responsibility the position of GM required. Also, in a perfect world, I'll be able to balance my internship (15 hrs/week) and a job (10-15 hrs/week) to a good point. The two classes I'm taking are both on Wednesdays, and are once a week.
I also plan on finally going through the formal application process for the Peace Corps -- I know my chances are probably under 30% of getting in, but it'd be the biggest step in my life I've ever taken, and one that I (honestly) believe God wants me to take. So we'll see.
yr hmbl & obt svt,
kev
Friday, June 08, 2007
Dear Elle,
I'm off to Las Vegas. If I never return, promise you'll visit.
If I return a millionaire though, I'm flying out to Finland.
yr hmbl & obt svt,
kev
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I'm off to Las Vegas. If I never return, promise you'll visit.
If I return a millionaire though, I'm flying out to Finland.
yr hmbl & obt svt,
kev
Monday, May 28, 2007
Dear Elle,
It has only recently come to my attention that I am extremely afraid of committing myself to another person, usually in the form of a romantic relationship. Many of the potential ones that could have formed with various individuals over the past year and a half or so simply didn't. I'm not putting the entire blame for that on myself, but I am slowly realizing it --- for whatever it's worth. Either way, pondering this shit doesn't pay my rent. Working and getting tips does that.
And even after an eight hour shift, my body is tired, but my mind is as awake as it always is. My body will crave a cigarette, but my mind will just want someone to smoke it with. At the same time, my eyes recognize a hundred different poetic images -- the broken fountain at the end of my street, the cracks and bumps I'm forced to drive across to see my best friend on the other side of Buffalo, but all my mind can focus on is when the gas in my apartment is going to be turned on so I can cook something for once.
I'd like something to ease my mind, but I don't have any drugs other than alcohol, which I've been good about not drinking by myself. The same lingering thoughts that are in my head when I'm sober remain, but instead I just have to pee every half hour.
I expect June to be a good month. My birthday is followed by a flight to Vegas literally four days later to see my dad. I've found pleasure in work by mastering the art of bullshit with my restaurant's patrons. And believe me, it truly is an art form, albeit one restrained within a corporate code of conduct.
Sarah called me a few days ago -- we only spoke briefly, but it was great to hear from her.
Hope to talk to you soon, too.
yr hmbl & obt svt,
kev
|
It has only recently come to my attention that I am extremely afraid of committing myself to another person, usually in the form of a romantic relationship. Many of the potential ones that could have formed with various individuals over the past year and a half or so simply didn't. I'm not putting the entire blame for that on myself, but I am slowly realizing it --- for whatever it's worth. Either way, pondering this shit doesn't pay my rent. Working and getting tips does that.
And even after an eight hour shift, my body is tired, but my mind is as awake as it always is. My body will crave a cigarette, but my mind will just want someone to smoke it with. At the same time, my eyes recognize a hundred different poetic images -- the broken fountain at the end of my street, the cracks and bumps I'm forced to drive across to see my best friend on the other side of Buffalo, but all my mind can focus on is when the gas in my apartment is going to be turned on so I can cook something for once.
I'd like something to ease my mind, but I don't have any drugs other than alcohol, which I've been good about not drinking by myself. The same lingering thoughts that are in my head when I'm sober remain, but instead I just have to pee every half hour.
I expect June to be a good month. My birthday is followed by a flight to Vegas literally four days later to see my dad. I've found pleasure in work by mastering the art of bullshit with my restaurant's patrons. And believe me, it truly is an art form, albeit one restrained within a corporate code of conduct.
Sarah called me a few days ago -- we only spoke briefly, but it was great to hear from her.
Hope to talk to you soon, too.
yr hmbl & obt svt,
kev
Saturday, March 17, 2007
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current book: ck williams